The time I almost died was tonight. I realize I have a tendency to exaggerate and over dramatize situations, but this potential death experience was real (in my head anyway).
I have this little closet under my stairs that houses the water heater, two artificial Christmas trees, my tool collection, every color of paint used in this home (and that is a lot), a ladder, a vacuum, more wrapping paper than any sane person should own, as well as a pile of wreaths for the front door. Last week this smell started emanating from the closet, but sometimes it gets a weird smell, so I ignored it. Today when I went downstairs, I noticed the smell had transformed itself into a full fledged stench and I was sure that some poor little critter had curled up in there to die.
I slowly opened the door, expecting whatever was in there to attack. Then I remembered that I was looking for a dead something. Dead somethings usually don't attack. Unless it is a zombie... My fear of finding something dead morphed into finding a little zombie mouse hiding out behind the water heater. I figured that wearing flip flops while searching for zombie mice was not the best idea, they could pull my toes right off (and I just got a pedicure today!). I briefly consider running upstairs to put on my wellies but rational thought wins out (and because I was already hot; rubber boots would not help).
As I am searching for either dead or undead mice, a spider lunges forward in attack mode. He lodges himself in the corner with his tremendous fangs ready to bite. Luckily, I keep Raid spider killer on hand and I spray him. It has no effect. He just wipes it right off. I spray him again; longer this time. He starts to scurry a little but still doesn't die. Isn't this stuff supposed to kill on contact? I spray him four more times and he is soon sitting in a white, thick, oozing puddle of Raid. I thought I would die from the fumes at this point but he still managed to wave a little leg in defiance before he succumbed.
I ran to identify him, and decided he was a brown recluse. If he had bitten me I could have lost my leg! (well, according to google images anyway).
I am now sitting on my sofa paralyzed in fear. I don't dare put my feet down for fear of zombie mice and brown recluse spiders. Oh, and there are still some residual Raid fumes wafting about. We are lucky I am still alive.......
PS - never found any dead critters
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